Film

This Nicolas Cage vehicle is g-g-g-rounded until all of the g-g-g-ghosts!

Nicolas Cage has made a LOT of movies. Some of them are pretty crummy, like the overwrought 2019 Southern Gothic melodrama Grand Isle.

In a real change of pace, John Travolta, late in his career, that was not good.

Nicolas Cage. A jaguar and a killer on the loose. A boat. All the ingredients for a goofy good time.

Holy shit is the 2019 H.P. Lovecraft adaptation Color Out of Space a terrifying and terrific masterpiece of cosmic horror.

After making The Cotton Club and Rumble Fish early in their careers, a well-fed Nicolas Cage and Laurence Fishburne reunite for 2019’s pulpy, profoundly silly Running With the Devil.

Nicolas Cage. Killer animatronics. What’s not to love?

My epic journey through Stuart Gordon’s life’s work comes to a close with a look back at his taped TV adaptation of the Chicago theater staple Bleacher Bums.

One of you kind souls paid me to see the bonkers martial arts Samourais. It was weird!

Stuart Gordon + SCTV? It happened, for a 1988 children’s instructional safety video, of all things.

No one asked for it, but in 1990, they made an It’s a Wonderful Life spin-off about Clarence’s further adventures.

It was not good.

You know who was great? Stuart Gordon. That man made a lot of good movies. Movies like 2007’s terrific and uncompromising Stuck.

We have reached the end.

What if I told you that there was a magical movie that combined mind-blowing stunts, rock and roll, wizards, the devil and Phil Hartman’s film debut? That might much too good to be true but it all came together in 1978’s Stunt Rock, possibly the greatest movie ever made.

I thought this was a movie about Jennifer Lopez fucking a sexy homeless ghost.

I was wrong.

Or was I?

We’re only an episode away from the finale of True Detective. Get ready for an anti-climax.

Stuart Gordon is a true auteur as well as a frightmaster but his 1990 television movie Daughter of Darkness is distressingly impersonal despite a solid turn from Anthony Perkins as an Eastern European vampire with dignity.

Cindy Crawford once made a movie that was a big old, non-sexy mistake.

You generous, career-sustaining sick fucks made me watch a movie where Rodney Dangerfield's got five wives—and a whole lot of headaches! No Respect January is proving to be fucking brutal. 

Sigh. 

It's your favorite cartoon characters as you've never seen them before: dourly delivering shrill anti-drug messages in a hilariously off-brand "Just Say No" extravaganza of nightmarish proportions! 

For latest installment of Control Nathan and Clint, you had us revisit the first time the Superman franchise went horrifically awry, Richard Lester’s Superman III, a terrible Richard Pryor comedy that’s just barely a superhero movie and comes alive only when Superman is being a raging, super-powered douche bag.

You guys had me re-watch the 1996 Shaq-as-rapping-genie movie Kazaam and I’m not gonna lie: it broke me a little bit.

You generous monsters made me and Clint watch and talk about the movie where a once-behoved franchise really Nuked the Fridge, metaphorically and of course literally as well. 

You kind-hearted sadists made me and Clint watch The Last Airbender. The phrase "quite poor" does not do justice to just how truly poor it is. 

Killer trees face off against Mark Wahlberg, SCIENCE MAN, in the spectacularly stupid, wonderfully entertaining camp classic THE HAPPENING.

A Predator is in town with a few days to kill in the enjoyably junky, very 1990 science-fiction/cop movie hybrid Predator.

As part of my ongoing, obsessive coverage of Loqueesha filmmaker Jeremy Saville’s life and work, I unearth some of his early Youtube work, including such tellingly titled clips as “The Girlfriend Trainer” and “GayDate.” In a shocking, unexpected turn of events, they’re quite poor and also pretty offensive!

If you thought Vince Offer’s 2013 sketch comedy abomination inAPPropriate Comedy was an abomination, you’re right, but its Vince Offer-heavy prequel, 1999’s The Underground Comedy Movie, is somehow even worse! It’s an Offer you can, and most assuredly should, refuse.

It's a second rate The Godfather parody with Rodney as the Rodfather! Plus, it's a Kevin McDonald vehicle. What's not to love? (a lot, actually) 

You know how everyone says Bright is total garbage? They're being overly generous. 

John Candy Month kicks off with a fond look back at 1989’s Who’s Harry Crumb, a stupid movie for dumb babies.

It all comes down to this! Feld-Month covers Corey Feldman and his scantily clad all-female backing band Corey's Angels' shamelessly entertaining, as well as just plain shameless, Branson, variety-show-style two-hour-plus live extravaganza in Atlanta. It's uh, well, it's something. Just read!

Was making July Corey Feldman month a terrible mistake? Probably. 

I’m sure this movie needed to be made.

Loqueesha looks impossibly bad. Writer-director-star Jeremy Savile’s vile previous film, the appallingly misogynistic 2012 atrocity The Test, may be even worse.

Like a knight in olden times, I met Loqueesha alone on the field of battle and emerged victorious. Buy The Joy of Trash! It’s got a whole bunch of stuff JUST like this.

You know how everyone says Bright is total garbage? They're being overly generous. 

In what I can safely deem the biggest disappointment of my life Meg 2: The Trench kinda sucks.

Do you enjoy racism and murder but fear Hispanics? Then boy, do we have a movie for you! A BAD movie, that is!

Fiona Apple’s dad gives an unforgettable performance as a Christmas-crazed killer in Christmas Evil, John Waters’ favorite Christmas movie.

Instead of going to the Gathering of the Juggalos, Insane Clown Posse’s yearly festival of arts and culture I took a little mind vacation to Vista Del Mar with some agreeable gals by the name of Barb and Star.

By the fifth film in the original series, the Child’s Play franchise had gotten ridiculously silly in a most delightful, meta kind of way.

Uh, subs?

Donald Duck is down to fuck in the shockingly horny 1944 animated masterpiece The Three Caballeros.

Charles Grodin Month comes to an end with a fond look back at Clifford, a notorious flop that cast Martin Short as a ten year old boy and Grodin as his apoplectic uncle that went on to find a dedicated cult thanks largely to podcaster Tom Scharpling.

Movies about television month kicks off with a fond look back at the trippy Kristin Wiig vehicle Welcome To Me, a surreal character study about a mentally ill woman who wins the lottery and uses the winnings to live out her Oprah Winfrey fantasies.

Before 48 Hours, Lethal Weapon or Beverly Hills Cop there was Alan Arkin and James Caan in Richard Rush’s wildly influential 1974 mismatched buddy cop cult classic Freebie and the Bean, a weirdly forgotten blockbuster as problematic as it is entertaining.

Here at Nathan Rabin’s Happy Place, it’s 420 every day!

There has, paradoxically, never been a better time to laugh at the idiot apocalypse of Mars Attacks! than now, when the end seems so tantalizingly, horrifyingly near.