Hoo Boy, House Party 3 is NOT Good

The surprise 1990 hit House Party was quietly groundbreaking in its depiction of black teen life that revolved around partying, dancing, having fun and getting laid rather than dodging gunfire, drug addiction and the many other perils of inner city life. Reginald Hudlin’s directorial debut proved that there was a sizable crossover market for different kinds of black movies but there was a lot of money to be made from targeting black audiences specifically.

When House Party came out it was an outlier. That was no longer the case when its second sequel was cranked out in the magical year of 1994. It was a uniquely blessed annum for both music and film, which is why I am devoting this entire year to re-examining its riches but you wouldn’t know it from House Party 3. It’s the kind of movie that casts both Immature and TLC in key roles, then has Immature do all the performing.

If you want to hold onto your fond memories of House Party do not waste your time with House Party 3. The movie is offensively lazy and half-assed. It’s blessed with a cast with some of the most beloved and talented performers of the past fifty years yet it feels like it was made without a script or really much of a sense of what they wanted to do and haphazardly improvised it in the moment. It feels like Bernie Mac came onto the set and had the following conversation with the director, whose name I refuse to learn on principal.

Bernie Mac: I'm excited to be in this film. I look forward to reading the script and seeing which character I play.

Director: Oh, this isn’t one of those dreary “typical” movies where everything is written out in advance and everyone is handcuffed by having to follow some of lousy “script” where they play boring “characters” and have to remember lots of dreary “dialogue.”

Bernie Mac: But there is at least an outline, right? A rough sense of what we’ll be doing? At least tell me something about the character I’ll be playing.

Director: You’ll be playing an extremely entertaining character who makes everybody laugh with all of the funny things he says! That shouldn’t be difficult because you’re Bernie Mac, right? You’re hilarious! Besides, this is Hip Hop, baby! Just “freestyle” a “dope” performance! Pretend you’re one of those rapper guys!

Even with nothing in the way of material Mac steals House Party 3 with his raucous performance as Kid’s rambunctious uncle. He’s one of a series of ringers brought in in an unsuccessful attempt to breathe new life into a series that was on life support and just barely holding on just three entries in.

The original House Party was filled with ringers and scene-stealers like Robin Harris, John Witherspoon, Martin Lawrence and Full Force as the antagonists but it was also a terrific vehicle for stars Kid N’ Play, who replaced original stars Will Smith and DJ Jazzy Jeff. Will Smith and DJ Jazzy Jeff were supposed to star in House Party as part of a settlement when New Line successfully sued them for copyright violation for “Nightmare on My Street” and could either pay off the settlement money or star in two movies for New Line.

Smith ended up not being in a beloved, influential hit movie but he ended up doing pretty well for himself all the same. Later he ended up appearing in a little movie called Collateral Beauty you might be familiar with. Not too shabby, eh?

Oooooh, on the Immature Tip

In House Party 3, however, Kid and Play are reduced to being insignificant supporting players in their own movie. Every character the film introduces is posited as being fresher, more fun and more exciting than the stars, who recede into the background.

Christopher Reid, now shamefully without his signature Eraserhead haircut, returns in the role of boyish rapper and promoter Kid. But the fresh-faced, boy next door charisma Reid displayed in the first film has been replaced with a much less endearing excess of professional ambition.

Christopher Martin similarly returns as Play, Kid’s best friend and business partner and the yin to his yang. House Party introduced Play as a street smart hustler working all the angles and Kid as a relatable, ingratiating everyman but here they’re both hustlers out to make money in the music business the old-fashioned way: by being unethical and sleazy and lying to musicians.

Kid and Play want to work with Sex as a Weapon, a sassy girl group played by TLC. TLC seem primarily concerned with amusing themselves by delivering their godawful dialogue in bizarrely stylized ways. The results betray just how little they care about the just-barely-a-movie they’re in and are intent on having fun. Along with Mac, they’re far and away the best part of the film but considering the context, stealing the film represents a misdemeanor at best.

Kid is getting married to a gorgeous and understanding woman so Play sets about throwing him a bachelor party that is taken over by Kid’s cousins from Detroit, who are played by Immature, a kiddie rap trio the movie delusionally sees as hilarious crowd-pleasers when really they’re almost impressively unlikeable and non-charismatic.

These little rascals disrespect their elders, routinely talk approvingly of the curvaceous posteriors of adult women, pull various grifts and generally behave like deplorable little shits. There’s only one word to describe the trio played by Immature: juvenile. And pre-pubescent. Also, non-precocious. I don’t think it’s right to be harsh towards child actors or child performers so I’ll just end by saying that every moment they’re onscreen is pure torture. Also, what’s going on with the hats?

Will Kid find the strength to refrain from cheating on his gorgeous wife in the immediate run-up to their wedding or will he give in to temptation?

The sad little soiree here is nothing compared to the titular celebration in the 1990 original, which over-achieved so dramatically that it has been ear-marked for preservation by the National Film Registry for being culturally relevant. It doesn’t even live up to the legendary Pajama Jammy Jam of House Party 2.

No one could possibly accuse House Party 3 of being culturally relevant to a historic extent, or relevant in any way.

A lot of very special, important and terrific movies were released in 1994.

This is not one of them.

Previously on 1994: A Look Back: Cabin Boy

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